Just for a while.

May 18, 2006 | 6 Comments

Time for a bit of a spiritual/artist’s retreat from the world. I’ll return on June 1st.

Feel free to leave comments or send email, as I will be checking both every now and then.

Posted by Christine | Filed Under Uncategorized

Good Apples

May 18, 2006 | 3 Comments

I found this a while ago, but I can’t remember where. I really like it and I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately. It’s true.

Women are like apples on trees: the best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren’t as good, but easy…

So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they’re amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along - the one who’s brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

That’s a very good message for both genders.

I am sending out hugs to all of the “good apple” women I know and love, and a “Bravo!” to the men who have had the courage and strength to reach for us.

Posted by Christine | Filed Under Uncategorized

Monday Music Mambo, #99

May 15, 2006 | 2 Comments

This just in from the home office in Mamboville…

Greetings mamboers! I don’t like today’s theme, so in honor of Mother’s Day on Sunday we’ll do a mother-themed meme.

1. Name a few songs either about mothers or made by a mother.

The first one — Hymn to Her – is one of my favorites.

Pretenders – Hymn to Her

Paul Simon – Mother and Child Reunion

Danzig – Mother

Three Dog Night – Mama Told Me Not to Come

2. What kind of music does/did your mother listen to?

I remember her listening to all kinds of music, but she especially liked 50s-60s-70s soul and rock. (Oh, my God. I am my mother!) I specifically remember her dancing to all of these songs. I wish I had it on video.

Buddy Holly – Rave On

The Supremes – Stop! In the Name of Love

Wilbert Harrison – Kansas City

Tony Joe White – Polk Salad Annie

Tom Jones – It’s Not Unusual

Wilson Pickett – Mustang Sally

Creedence Clearwater Revival - Travelin’ Band

3. Which musician’s mother do you want to thank for bringing him or her into the world?

Oh, lots of them. Today it would be Stevie Wonder’s mama. I’m hitting his playlist hard and loving it all.

Stevie Wonder - My Cherie Amour

Stevie Wonder ~ If You Really Love Me

Stevie Wonder ~ You Are the Sunshine of My Life

**********

That’s this week’s Mambo, my friends! Snag ‘em if you want ‘em — they’re here until next time. :yes:

Posted by Christine | Filed Under Monday Music Mambo

Where’s that Mambo?

May 15, 2006 | 2 Comments

I dunno. It hasn’t been published yet. Hmmm. Now I shall commence worrying about the Mememeister. I hope he’s ok. (Don’t you love how I become the stereotypical Jewish mama anytime someone else’s schedule fluctuates unexpectedly? *Wringing hands and pacing* I learned from the best. Heh.)

***

So how was your Mother’s Day? I talked with Mama Dory yesterday. I think it sort of shocked her that I called at 9 am. She sounded so hopeful that my early call was a sign of me normalizing into a Day Person, but then I had to go and disappoint her and tell her that I hadn’t been asleep yet. Gah.

I suppose I could have fibbed for her comfort. But I’ve stopped doing that with my family. Now all they get from me is the ugly ol’ truth.

I explained to her that my doctors told me that it’s not important what time of day that I sleep, just as long as I am eventually sleeping at least 7 hours in a row. That’s what I am working towards.

So, anyway, after we got beyond that issue we had a nice chat. She’s really looking forward to the end of the school year. I honestly don’t see her as someone who would ever retire (unless necessary for health reasons) – but I can tell that she’s getting more exasperated with the educational system and ready for summer vacations more than ever each year.

I don’t blame her one bit. She works at a school that is in one of the poorer districts of town. She sees a lot of directionless kids in unfortunate situations and has to deal with lots of idiotic, neglectful parents.

I honestly don’t know how she has done it for so long. I would have been tempted to start knocking heads together years ago.

The only reasonable answer is that my mom is a saint.

Yes, I said it. Saint Dory.

Dory, Patron Saint of the Grade School Sorrows and Sleepless Daughters.

***

I’m in a weird, tense mood. There’s lots of junk floating to the surface and therapy has been a real bitch lately. It’s hard to keep going in for my appointments every week, but afterwards I am always glad that I did.

Most of it is weight-loss related stuff. And as Dr. K likes to call it: Identity Transformation.

Yeah, I know. It sounds delightful doesn’t it?
I actually found an article about this online this weekend, which surprised me, because … well, you know… I’m very self-absorbed and clearly felt like I am the only person who has ever attempted this thing. This Identity Transformation Thing.

You can find the article HERE.You’ll need Adobe Acrobat installed to read it.

It talks about the conflicting psychological issues that arise when people attempt to make a transition from a “stigmatized” identity (in my case, a fat one) to a non-stigmatized one.

Let me tell you, it is hard mental and spiritual work. Everything you could possibly imagine about yourself is snarled up in all that bullshit. I told Dr. K last week that I feel like a big, knotted ball of yarn and every time I pull on a loose string the tangles get tighter and worse.

He assures me that this is a normal part of the process and encourages me to keep going. I know he is right. I mean, I made it through the transformation of abuse victim to survivor-thriver. I know it can be done.

I’m tired, though. And sometimes I’m afraid that I don’t have the energy to see my way through it all. And worse, sometimes I feel like I do have the energy, but I’m just not going to do it because it’s easier, safer and more familiar to remain in a stigmatized identity like the one I am moving away from.

Crossroads really suck sometimes.

Posted by Christine | Filed Under Uncategorized