Muttering matters.

June 28, 2008 | 6 Comments

I say … and you think … ?

1. Loneliness :: There are worse things. Like being surrounded by asshats.
2. Traffic :: Rush hour
3. Chaos :: Rush hour traffic, surrounded by asshats
4. Burp :: Tupperware - the burp is patented, you know!
5. 500 :: Indy
6. Movie :: The Goonies
7. Coma :: Me? No hope? Pull the freakin’ plug.
8. Bark :: Woof!
9. Stare :: Impolite.
10. Angelina :: Brad’s old lady.

I’d blather on a bit more, but my mind is overly-full and nothing will come out in a coherent manner.

I think I forgot my meds. Not good.

(Go take yours now before you forget, too.)

~ XoxoxXXoo

Posted by Christine | Filed Under The Scoop

Very timely.

June 27, 2008 | 1 Comment

George Carlin’s Views on Aging

“Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

“‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m four and a half!’ You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key.

“You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

“‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m gonna be 16!’ You could be 13, but hey, you’re gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

“But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now, you’re just a sour-dumpling… What’s wrong? What’s changed?

“You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it’s all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

“But wait! You MAKE it to 60. You didn’t think you would!

“So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and make it to 60.

“You’ve built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it’s a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

“You get into your 80’s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn’t end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; ‘I Was JUST 92.’

“Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. ‘I’m 100 and a half!’”

Well, may we all make it to a healthy 100 and a half.

Now…

HOW TO STAY YOUNG:

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay ‘them.’

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3.Keep learning! Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’ And the devil’s family name is Alzheimer’s.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don’t take guilt trips.. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

Ohhh, look… an opportunity!

I love you all.

Posted by Christine | Filed Under The Scoop

The Lemur, she thinks too much.

June 25, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Back again, dear friends. The visit with The ‘Rents went very well - we had some fun and spent lots of time together. They left early on Tuesday morning.

I know I should be happy because it was such a nice time, but I am feeling empty right now. I had the same feeling after I came back from visiting my sister Laura a few weeks ago. It’s not sadness, just a profound awareness of their absence and the physical distance between all of us.

*********

On their way across the state, The ‘Rents drove through what was left of the small town of Parkersburg ( which was totally obliterated by tornadoes last month) and they also saw lots of the flooded counties as well. Two-thirds to three-quarters of the state has been declared a disaster area due to the floods and most places won’t be able to plant crops at all this year.

It’s just really sad.

When you live in Iowa, one of the neatest things is watching the fields progress as they go through planting, growing and harvest. That’s not going to happen around here for the first time in my life and it’s going to seem very strange.

And there is always the saying about the corn crop: You know it’s going to be a good harvest if the corn is at least knee high by the 4th of July.

Well, this year, we will be lucky if the flood waters keep dropping and are only knee high by that time.

Please say a prayer for everyone that lives here. Send positive energy, because it is much needed!

*********

Gah. I sound like such a downer. I’ll have to change that tone by my next entry.

Be good, be well until then!

~ XoXoxox

Posted by Christine | Filed Under The Scoop

Well!

June 17, 2008 | Leave a Comment

So much for regular updating, eh?

If you’ve had problems accessing this page the past few days, it’s because my host was undergoing a change - migrating things and updating the servers and something called Apache - which in turn messed up my MYSQL database.

Pffft. Don’t ask me what that means - I just do the typing around here.

Anywayyyyy…

In the latest news, The ‘Rents are coming for a visit on Thursday and will be staying until Tuesday of next week. I’m actually really excited about it, but it also means that I have to *clean-clean-clean* and I’m not excited about that. Blah.

I always say: it’s a good thing we have house guests a few times a year otherwise we would be rolled in cat hair, buried in clutter, and topped off with a sprinkling of dead Philodendron leaves.

It’s so pathetic.

More again soon, kittens…

~ xoXOXoxox

Posted by Christine | Filed Under The Scoop

How high’s the water, Mama?

June 15, 2008 | 3 Comments

Just wanted to let everyone know that we’re still safe and somewhat dry here in Dubuque. There is severe flooding all around us, though. Like “Hurry up and build the ark, Noah!” kind of flooding.

It freaks me out that it’s so close. On Thursday, Jer and one of his co-workers had to go on a business trip elsewhere in the state and on Friday the very same roads that they had traveled on were under 10 feet of water. There are some cities here that require 200 mile detours just to get to.

The latest reports say that many of the rivers and waterways will not crest until the middle of this week (and some places are already 15ft over flood stage!) The bad thing is that it just keeps raining off and on, big fat drops. But in a way, it’s good because people in a few areas are collecting rain water to use for bathing and flushing.

Iowans are hearty people with a strong work ethic and there’s no doubt we will help each other through this devastation. Mother Nature just does her thing every once in a while and we simply have to stand back, behold her power, then collect ourselves and move forward.

Its only on rare occasions that you will find a few disgruntled people, exhausted from sandbagging, huddled in groups and quietly blaming “Global Moistening” on Al Gore.

That treacherous, omnipotent bastard!